Smart LifeStyles

Connecting Builds Strong Relationships-Part 2

As I look back at my relationship with God and my husbands of the past, I recognize how I strayed away. In Romans 1:21-24, Paul makes it plain that when those of us who do not have a strong relationship with God will turn to other 'gods' to satisfy the void that we create in ourselves. In trying to fill this void, we turn to 'sexual impurity' and other immoral acts; dying in the mess that we create for ourselves. I write this because I am witness to individuals' whose lives are falling apart because of decisions they have made and are making on their own strength without fully seeking and waiting on an answer from the Lord. This is my opinion based on my experience. I too, in the past, made decisions for myself instead waiting on the Lord and/or addressing them with the person who hurt me.

When I first sought to get married, I was 20 years old. My husband-to-be and I were inexperienced in living in a God-centered family life. I attended church faithfully so I thought I knew God and that my thoughts and decisions were correct. My fiance did not attend church and at that time I didn't fully understand what it meant to be 'unequally yoked.' When I went to my pastor, who had known me for 6 years; but not understanding that he also knew and understood my family home life, he refused to perform the wedding. His reasons were that my parents had been divorced and my fiance was not born into a family with a father.

I was angry and hurt. How dare he deny me the privilege of getting married like my friends and my brothers? My brothers came from the same family yet they were allowed to get married in a church; mind you not our church. Because of this, I left the church that I had been raised, baptisted and Sunday schooled for over 14 years. I left because I was taught a head knowledge about God; but I wasn't taught the importance of having a relationship or understanding of what God wanted for me.

I never confronted or spoke to Rev. Roman or attended Canaan Baptist Church again. I never sought what the Lord wanted for me.

As I look back on the decisions I've made in my life...I can honestly say...that's how I pursued my relationships until my 20 year relationship and marriage to my deceased husband Donald. When people said "No" or disagreed with my desires; I moved on and did it anyway--my way. Since Donald's death, I have grown so much in the Lord; I can't even begin to tell you. If you see my smile, just know that it's genuine. It comes from a wellspring of faith and trust. That wellspring is the water that Jesus spoke about to my sister, the 'Woman at the Well.' Like her I had many husbands, none were truly my husband. My true husband is the one the Lord presented to me and whom I am married to now, Willie Smart.

God is stirring the pot in my life. He has poured into me ingredients that are making my life sweet. I encourage you to be still and let God speak into your life. I invite you to find a 'church home' that you can be educated but also edified in your walk with the Lord. What do I mean by edified? I mean that you will find a gathering of like-minded Christians who know and love the Lord and together you build a strong relationship by connecting to Christ, connecting to your "church" and connecting to your community. We are not suppose to live isolated lives. There are many husbands, wives and children living under the same roof, yet they don't even pray together, let alone speak respectfully to each other.

I attend Green Grove Baptist Church in West Berlin, New Jersey...240 Cushman Avenue...off of Route 73. My Pastor is Rev. George E. Holland, Sr. In Vineland New Jersey, you have Rev. A. David Griffin is the Pastor of Adullam, 1049 E Chestnut Ave, Vineland, NJ 08360.

Wow!!! Watch this...I just realized the connection between King David of the old testament and Rev. Griffin. Rev. Griffin brought me back to the Lord and Rev. Holland is sustaining and helping me grow stronger in my walk. So I credit both these men as being my Pastor and Teacher. Yet, I only have one Pastor that I follow and that's Pastor Holland. I love Rev. Griffin as a big brother and respect him a great deal.

Back to the point! 1 Samuel 22 tells of how David hid out in the cave of Adullam. Rev. Griffin's middle name is David. I often wondered why he changed how he was addressed from Rev. Albert to Rev. A. David...now I understand. He is modern day David taking refuge with his soldiers in the Cave of Adullam. I wouldn't have understood this if I did not have a connection with the Lord's word and a connection to understanding Rev. Griffin's connection with Jesus. Praise the Lord.

I'll stop here. I gave testimony about how I missed many years of peace and joy because I lacked a strong connection to the Lord's word and how it fit in my life. Those years I will never get back. I can only pray that in the years the Lord will allow me have, that I will continue to be transparent as I share my experience and my 'ahha' moments. I am a writer who has been blessed with the talent of clarity. I clearly understand my role. Although I seek wealth through my business ventures, I also seek to know what the Lord wants for me. Only me. I cannot seek what he wants for my husband, that's Willie's responsibility. I've learned that the only changes that really matter are the changes that are made by me...for me. But I trust that the Lord has placed us together because our walk is along the same path.

John Maxwell moment: "Many people go further than they thought they could go because someone else believed they could and told them so."

"25 Ways to Win with People" John C. Maxwell and Les Parrott, Ph.D.

I believe that I can go further in life than I ever imagined because Jesus said "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26

I've dedicated all that I do the my Lord and Savior Jesus. Selah.

Connecting Builds Strong Relationships

There are many people that I know have a hard time reaching out. I can tell by their body language and by their level of participation when in a social setting. I pray that the secrets to a successful relationship that I share will be helpful to you and/or someone that you are working hard to reach.

Smart Tip : Stop using the 'try' word. I have replaced 'try' with "working hard to" in my previous sentence. I could have said, "...that I share will be helpful to you and/or someone that you are trying to reach." As Yoda said, "Do or do not there is no try."

If I may be bold, I would like to make some changes in a few bible verses that may help more people accomplish what it asks us to do.

1 Corinthians 14:12
So it is with you. Since you are eager to have spiritual gifts, try to excel in gifts that build up the church.

Revised:
So it is with you. Since you are eager to have spiritual gifts, work hard to excel in gifts that build up the church.

1 Thessalonians 5:15
Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.

Revised:
Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always work hard to be kind to each other and to everyone else.

I apologize for being so bold to change the word of God...he said try. It seems in today's society we use the word 'try' as a scapegoat to get out of doing things. It is my desire to help us grow stronger and closer in our walk. "I tried, but I couldn't do it." "I tried, but it's hard." How about, "I worked really hard at it but I couldn't get it done." It at least shows some action had been taken. At this point I can ask the question, "What have you done?" Then it opens up the possibilities that you may have missed a step that I could help you complete.

If you struggle, don't struggle alone. We have so many more resources available to us. Share your struggle with a family member, friend or even a complete stranger that you meet in a social setting (even facebook via the Inbox feature which is a private one-on-one communication tool). You do not know who the Lord will send to you to help you out of your struggle.

Here is a mentoring moment from John Maxwell. "Only the spoon knows what is stirring in the pot." When you allow another person to know what is stirring within you, you instantly make a meaningful connection with him. Who doesn't want to know what's going on in the mind of someone they care about?

From: 25 Ways to Win with People...How to Make Others Feel Like a Million Bucks by John C. Maxwell and Les Parrott, Ph.D.

I thank God for my gifts and my desire to grow stronger in his will. I thank him for the internet because it allows someone like myself to write the teachings that come my way. I thank him for Rev. D. Albert Griffin and Rev. George E. Holland, Sr. both men of God who have the ability to make it plain, and also encourage and empower the people who sit in their presence to connect to Christ, the church and the community.

I encourage you to comment on this note, and ask you to share your thoughts about a tool you use to bring people closer to you, to Christ, the Church and your Community.

Let your light shine as you go chase Jesus.

Understanding is a Fountain of Life

    My title is from the October 7, 2009 Daily Bread.  The scripture is from Proverbs 16:16-22, the verse that I am focused on is verse 22.

I understand what the Lord has for me to do with my life here in this earthly body.  He has gifted me with spiritual gifts and earthly gifts. I enjoy using them all.  I've taught the intricacies of Spiritual Gifts and how when we use them our lives are blessed.  My strongest gifts are to serve and teach.  Serving is easy because most people readily accept assistance.  Teaching is a struggle for me, because not everyone is open to change.  I've learned that having an open mind, willing to listen to new possibilities has helped me grow quickly in the Lord and my life has been blessed more than I could have ever imagined.

My Purpose in Life

    I have been connected to Christ and his teachings and my life has been enriched and full. I have connected with my congregation both within the four walls of Green Grove Baptist in West Berlin, New Jersey where I attend, and outside through my networking with various ministries.  I have also connected with my community in the work the I do in West Philadelphia in the after-school program; my work I do with my authors, and my work in the health and wellness industry.

My Teaching Moment

Word for Today: Wealth

"The LORD sends poverty and wealth; he humbles and he exalts." 1 Samuel 2:7 

^"But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today." Deuteronomy 8:18

"A good man leaves an inheritance for his children's children, but a sinner's wealth is stored up for the righteous." Proverbs 13:22

We have discovered the secret to legally and ethically build a business that will bless generations to come. I understand that being self-employed is not for everyone. Honestly, I only am looking for two more people to work with closely. 

Smart NuMath

3+3+3 does not equal 9.  3+3+3 = 27 Through understanding this equation, you will be given a fountain overflowing with an abundant lifestyle.

Email me at OneSmartLady50@gmail.com.